We have just had a lovely camping holiday in North Wales, a sort of default holiday choice as I had to accompany my grandson to a GP appointment in Chester. So it became two for the price of one and we really have been blessed with some gorgeous sunshine, grand views of sea scapes, mountain heights, streams slow and fast, kind people and on and on.
But in it all was a dark cloud of concern for my grandson, some autistic traits shackle his understanding.
My dear young man struggles with employment, relationships, social interaction etc. The general problems which tie up more folk than you can imagine, in reality autism is quite a big issue but often goes unrecognised making life a struggle for great, intelligent and kindly people. people who want to be given a chance, who want to contribute to society, but can't break in to the required 'norm'!
You can hear, dear friend that this affects me personally and I wish I had an answer or a wand I could wave!
I have prayed, have pleaded with the Lord to bring him back nearer home, or to find him a job, to get him support or best of all, to heal him; but no answer comes forth. I get the sense that I am to 'wait' and I do manage that for a day or two and then I am back to weeping in prayer. 'Where is God in all this'? and eventually all my toys are out of the pram and I become dry, despondent, miserable and prayerless. let's call it faithless, that would probably be more accurate.
So the holiday ends and we start off for home, long journey ahead of us, I immediately start to pray for our safety on the journey, as I usually do. In fact I generally don't go anywhere in the car without asking for the Lords protection. Having prayed I would happily drive on and be thankful when we arrive home safely.
Today I started to pray thus, and sensed that the Lord was questioning me as to why I believe He would answer my prayer for a safe journey and ignore my prayer for my grandson. Think about it? I did! Why would He be selective? He wouldn't be! so why do I have faith for one thing and not another? Is God limited in power? Is he picky about the prayers He answers?
It brought tears of shame to my eyes, repentance to my heart for my hypocrisy, and faith was restored to my heart, Faith in His faithfulness and His immeasurable love for my grandson.
May I not forget this sharp lesson, may I pray differently for him in the morning.
His name is Matti by the way.
