Living under the ........

This week I had to re visit my doctor to get the results of some tests I had undergone a few weeks back. I had little notion of what he was about to say and when I heard his diagnosis the words struck home and continued to resonate around my head for hours and hours.

I thought, I imagined, I researched, I considered, 'an enlarged heart'! What was this going to mean, what does it mean right now? 'An enlarged heart'?

The website was pretty grim, or at least the words I chose to dwell on and my imagination worked its work to top off the weight now leaning heavily upon my spirit.

The next day I resorted to prayer, by now really angry that this should befall me, did I expect this, no, yes, no. At my age? Of course! With my family history? Of course! But as my conversation with my heavenly Father continued I found a question rising in me. 'Are you going to live the rest of your life under this diagnosis'?
Let us not get this wrong! No I am not going to be unwise and live in denial of what is going on in my body but that was not the thrust of the question.  Again the question challenged my position, was the diagnosis going to dictate how I would live the rest of my life?

I heard myself cry out to the Father, 'I do not want to live under the shadow of this diagnosis'. I stopped to ponder the concept of a 'shadow'. which takes you immediately to Psalm 23 where David talks about 'the valley of the shadow of death' but this is swiftly followed by the promise of His continued Presence, the rod, the staff, the bountiful table, the oil, the abundant goodness and loving kindness which would follow me all the days of my life, and finally the dwelling place prepared for me in the House of the Lord, forever.

From verse 4 onwards it clearly demonstrates that - 'even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death' there is all the rest of the chapter on offer. Where do I want to live? Under the blessings, the promises or under the alternative dark place?

Then as with a spring leaping from the earth comes the refreshment of PS 91 'He who dwells in the shelter of the most high, will abide (or dwell) in the shadow of the Almighty'. And He will cover me with His pinions, and under His wings I may seek refuge. (v4)

Living under the shadow of His wings I will find security and standing in His presence I will bring my worship.

“Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.”
Ps 143:8